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Its no secret that most betches arent like astonishing at budgeting their fund. But like, who can really blame you? You suck at cooking, but pretend to be vaguely health self-conscious, so a lot of your fund goes towards kind of expensive salads.( How much are salads even supposed to be? I genuinely have no idea, but every time I buy a salad, Im like Wait, that felt kind of overpriced .) Betches are a really interesting demographic financially, because like, youll swipe your credit card for a $200 pair of jeans that build your butt look dope without blinking, but your Google search history includes things like Will cheap booze build me drunk faster? and Does generic Plan B study? What, you Googled that for your roommate? Right.

Anyway, Im plainly not a financial expert or anything, but Im a self-proclaimed browse expert, so I feel like its my duty to help you out here. Actually, I dont guess I should even go as far as to say that Im a self-proclaimed expert. I guess I just like hearing myself talk. But yeah, theres tons of shit you only straight up shouldnt be the purchase and Im here to save you from that. Here are five things you are able to literally never buy.

1. Fake Gucci Loafers

Steve Madden only released about a million pairs of shoes that are straight rip-offs of the Gucci Princetown Loafer Mule. At $80, these loafers are pretty much only a glorified knockoff, but theyre produced by a brand youre familiar with so you dont have to go into some creepy stockroom on Canal Street to get them.

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Im not telling you to splurge on the $800 Gucci shoes and Im definitely not bashing fast fashion. Stores like Zara and H& M are awesome for picking up inexpensive attire that provokes a similar-looking vibe to high-end intends. However, the line between being inspired by luxury fashion and blatantly ripping it off is so penalty, my Kat Von D liquid eyeliner couldnt describe it. These shoes are frankly such a scam, buying them is basically one stair away from wiring fund to the guy from Nigeria emailing you to send him fund because his funds are tied up in Europe. There are so many other styles of inexpensive , non-tacky shoes in the world to choose from. You have literally no reason to purchase these, ever.

2. Designer Headphones

I have a lot of unpopular opinions considering Lilly Pulitzer that Ill either continue to myself or save for a later date( quick preview: I think wearing boxy tunics covered in a neon seashell print is the dumbest shit you can do ), but in regards to this list, do not buy Lilly Pulitzer, or any other designer ear buds. Theyre pretty much the crappy ear buds that came with your iPod touch a million years ago, but with a designing that were likely to build them easier to describe when you undeniably leave them at the gym in two weeks and ask the guy at the front desk if hes seen them.

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Beats by Dr. Dre has $100 in-ear headphones that you should probably just spring for. Sure, theyre $80 more and dont have a floral designing( which seems like a plus to me, but no judgement ), but by the time youve gone through a few pairs of shitty headphones, youll have wished you only bought these instead.

3. Expensive, Trendy Sunglasses

You know how they say you should try to keep a flower alive before you get a bird-dog? And that you should read to take care of a pet before you have kids? Well, I tell screw all of that and buy yourself a pair of expensive sunglasses if you want to know how responsible you really are. Plot spoiler: Youre irresponsible AF and might as well only expended that $200 on Candy Crush lives because itll last way longer.

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You is certainly buy decorator sunglasses if you like, HAVE to have a particular designing or know that youll be able to hold onto them for a while. For example, Ray Ban Wayfarers are a good mind, because theyre a classic style and you are able to place a knock-off from a mile away. However, if youre just looking for a pair of glasses that look like something you saw on Kylie Jenners Snapchat, its not really worth it to spend a lot. Theres actually no phase in getting Illesteva glass when you can get a pair that seems precisely like them literally anywhere else for less, because theyre probably just a fad that youll keep forgetting when you watch Kylies story tomorrow and shes wearing yet another pair.( And if it sounds like Im belying myself on what I said about the faux Guccis, dedicate it another read. The phase is to find something similar , not a total knockoff .)

4. Tacky Phone Cases

I get it. Youve been in line at Forever 21 for 15 long minutes and are trying to decide if the$ 6 choker youre about to get is even worth it. The bins by the counter, which are actually only strategically placed black holes, are starting to look appealing. You take a look through and find a glisten phone case, and its less than $10 so you decide to get it.

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Unless you crave your life to be ruined, you are able to absolutely set that tacky phone case down. Theres a 0% chance itll save your phone during your next bender. All of the junky phone cases in the world arent worth a scratching on the most valuable 4.7 inches of property you own( aka, your phone screen ). The only thing more brutal than having a shattered phone screen is having to pay to get onto fixed, so only be a decent human being and buy a legitimate phone case, like perhaps one from Shop Betches.

5. Cheap Watches

In case you haven’t noticed , nobody actually needs watches anymore because we’re only ever on our phones, which likewise tell the time if you didn’t realise. Likewise, manually changing the time on something when Daylight Saving Time happens is such a buzzkill. Yes I know that doesn’t happen very frequently, but of the watches I own , none of them have ever been changed with Daylight Saving Time. It’s just like, too much work for my busy lifestyle.

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Anyway, don’t spend money on dumb cheap watches. They’ll probably become your wrist green, or break or something. Who needs a crappy watch to be said that what time it is when you have your Uber driver constantly calling you to tell you he’s been waiting outside for five minutes and is about to dip out?

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